when David met Marcy....

This Saturday, May 15, I will have been married to Marcy 18 years. Not a round number yet, or a milepost for that matter, but definitely noteworthy.

I'd like to take this time to put a few reflective thoughts on my life partner and spouse.

I remember the first time I saw her. It was at an undecorated gymnasium at a young adults dance in Hillsboro, Oregon. She was trying her best to keep up with a taller (larger) man doing gyrating 1980's dance moves. She looked a bit distressed, and I was looking for a way out of a dramatic love triangle. I couldn't help but want to come to her aid if at all possible. The song ended, but the dude didn't move on. I started towards her, but at that point she had made herself an excuse or something and got away on her own - also away from me. So, I waited. When she came back into the dance area, gyrating dude started towards her again as a slower song came on. I gracefully raced to her first and asked her to dance. Her first words ever to me were "Thank you - his eyes kept rolling back in his head". I know - romantic, huh? My first words were something like "Uh, my name is David... David Kestner - What's your name?" Smooth, right? Anyways, we danced a few more songs, and then we moved on. I can't recall if I asked her to dance again that night, but remember commenting that I went to most of the bi-regional dances as long as I wasn't working and would look for her again in the future. She said she would do the same.

Flash forward one week.....The next time I saw Marcy was at a well attended dance in Portland, Oregon. I kid you not when I say that I could have been 10 feet away from her and not seen her, there were so many people at this dance - but, it was easy to find her due to the "shaft of light" that shown upon her this evening. I saw her from across the room, and spent the next few songs making my way towards her. We met somewhere in the middle of the floor and danced a few songs. At that point, we made an agreement that we would always save a dance for one another if we attended the same dances in the future. That was fine by me. I was there with a friend who like me had to get up early in the morning the next day and we left before the dance was over.

Marcy and I kept this coy relationship up for a few more weeks until at one dance, I found Marcy alone in the hall looking at some artwork. I approached her and asked her what she was thinking. Her response "it's beautiful". If I had been a cheesy pick up artist, I may have said "Why yes I am". Instead, I asked her why she wasn't dancing. She replied "Justin, my ex boyfriend is here". I then said something like, "want me to beat him up? or Show him your new boyfriend" or maybe I was just thinking that. At any rate, that evening I got her home and work phone number and invited her to a fireside at the Vancouver West Stake Center the next evening. She said she thought she had to work, but would see if she could get off early.

The next day after church, I drove to Longview, WA to her work (JC Penny) to give my invitation in person to her again in front of her boss. (The one who could decide if she could get off a little early.) I don't know if that move worked, but, I was sitting next to Marcy at the fireside that evening.

Her smell was intoxicating. She wore Xia Xiang (I called it Zing Zing). Her hair, long, blond, loose and flowing. Her eyes, depending on her mood and colors she wore were a cross between green and blue. But - her smile. That smile could light up a room. That evening, I could see clearly for the first time. That evening, as I followed her to the gas station to help her put gas into her mother's Pontiac LaMans, I told myself that I definitely wanted to write to her while I was on my mission.

There was something about the sweet innocence of this beautiful young lady. There was an intrigue to her ability to stay very aloof and treat me as "just another guy". I was shocked when after meeting her many more times at dances, going to firesides and sitting next to each other, and doing this for 4 - 6 weeks, we weren't "dating". Could have fooled me. THE CHASE WAS ON!

I found out later that she didn't want to complicate things as I was leaving on a mission in the next few months, so wanted to keep the relationship "just friends". It would be several years before I found out what she really thought of me.......